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Negotiation.jpgUnderstanding your temperament, and those of the people around you, is key to negotiation.  That is what I learned today, anyway.

The other thing I have learned is that it is good to speak up as soon as something goes wrong.

Negotiation is still something I need to work on – perhaps I should make it a goal.

It will add to my happiness and promote the stress-free life I am building.

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Why Study?

Study1.jpgWhat motivates you to study?

There are, of course, lots of good reasons to study; for the end career, for the present joy of studying; to change course; to progress in your job.

It doesn’t even have to be something you share with others.  If you really think about it, you’ll know what keeps you motivated.

Whatever your reason, find what fuels you and run with it.

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I Don’t Have Bi-polar Disorder

Candle.jpgEver feel like you’ve been misdiagnosed?  I do.  I’ve never had depression, or sustained periods of mania.  Therefore I can only surmise I don’t have bi-polar disorder.

Though that is my official diagnosis, my psychiatrist has taken a very hands off approach (I am not on medication) and said it is up to me how I take this forward.

That is why I am going the holistic route to understanding my psychological difficulties.

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Being a Snail

Snail.jpgThis sounds like a psychotic tale,
Perhaps it is.  Perhaps it’s not.
I know I’d like to be a snail.
Who gets things done,
And smiles a lot.

I’d like to take my dearest dreams,
And make them dearest real.
I know I’d like to be a snail.
Who gets things done,
The real deal.

Is it true or fantasy?
I can do something good.
I know I’d like to be a snail.
Who gets things done…
So I’d better get to work.

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Protein Power

protein.jpgToday I ate a LOT of protein; fish, scampi, protein bars and protein boosted yogurt.

It’s pretty much all I wanted (I always listen to my body when it comes to food), and the cravings kept coming all day.

I did a lot of exercise this morning – ten minutes is a lot when you have MS.

I wonder if high protein and a nap post-exercise is the key to cutting down recovery time, because post-nap I’ve been feeling pretty good.  I even got some stuff done.

Which reminds me I must finish my chore.

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Games People Play

games.jpgThis is an amazing book written by Eric Berne in 1963.  While a little outdated and completely male-centric, as well as routed in Western culture, at least the book admits games will change along-side the socio-cultural landscape: ‘new games are continually being discovered’ (Berne 1963:61).  I would love to see culturally specific versions of this book around the world, but, by reading it, wherever you are from, you will get the idea.

It pioneers an approach now widely used in therapy:  Transactional Analysis.  If you have ever had mental health issues I highly recommend you read this book; it will help you have healthier relationships.  ‘I’m OK – You’re OK’ is also a great follow-on book.

It discusses the concept of social intercourse, and says that it is a way of working.  Let me go back a few beats.

So as we are growing up, we learn social intercourse in three stages: material programming, social programming, and individual programming.  Material programming is the way in which we build ourselves as humans, social programming is the way in which we learn social propriety, i.e during rituals such as weddings, or even going to the hairdresser.  Individual programming is where we learn from our own life experiences.

From marital games to sexual games to good games, Berne discusses the many games people can play during social intercourse, and the ways in which they are played.

I highly recommend this book, and while I’m moving on to a new book now, I will keep going back to it I’m sure.

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My Two Beds

bed.jpgI have an all-singing all-dancing bed that moves up and down, backrest up, or even legs up if I want.  NHS issue.

It really helps if I’m feeling wobbly/tired.

Ask your OT.

The other bed I have is a mattress on the floor in case I accidentally end up there at night.  It happens every now and again

It means I don’t have to bother people until the morning and the bed’s all made with clean bedding.  Yum.

Life with illness is managable, it just needs a little organising.

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Dealing with my Strategy Brain

Strategy.jpgIt has been many months… but I came back.

I think I might have found an answer.

One of the problems I have is I’m an idea and strategy person, and not much more.  Every week I have a new idea and a strategy to go with it.  This week it was:

A hometown-wide community older generation friending venture called ‘Old Friends’.  CRBs essential, obviously.

But I know I am not a take it forwarder so I’ve shared the idea and suggested someone else take it forward.

It made me sad to know I couldn’t do it; it’s super unlikely to happen.

There have been many ideas over the years, such as training to be an engineer and building bridges

So I got to thinking… Surely it takes a super-strategy to deal with such a wily brain?  And what does that mean?

Strategies I’ve tried before:

  • Find a job that works for me (yeah, right).
  • Convince myself and employer that I can do it.
  • Positive affirmations.
  • Push, push, push through the pain.

They don’t work.  The only thing I’ve got is compassion and self-love, and a killer idea-factory of a mind, strategy bungy ropes pinging outward.  So to make this work for me, rather than against me – I’m 31 and this might be the first time I’ve worked out how to work, long-term, on a single concept of an idea – I have to love myself through each little fall and failure.  And not care if I stop.  Everything that I do or don’t do is okay.

It’s a tough idea to get into my head, but when I do… watch this space 🙂